Just as any other 25-year-old single woman, I get asked one question, far more often than most.
So today, I’m going to give you both vulnerable and blatantly honest, yet very different answers to the universal, million dollar question.
Why are you single?
I’m single because I friend-zone before I fall. While I have an immense amount of love to give, I feel pretty close to incapable of opening my heart and life to someone else. At least right here and right now. Not out of fear of rejection or heartbreak, because that I can handle. Rather, it stems from feeling skeptical of what exactly true and genuine love has the potential to be.
I’m single because I have a very difficult time trusting men. I have always been the type of person to have a pretty good and fairly accurate read on people after meeting them — yet even if it’s the nicest guy in the world, a part of me will always remain cautious and skeptical until actions have proven otherwise. This has more to do with past experiences than it does with any one specific person.
I’m single because I know my heart, and I know it well. When it’s right, I know my heart will allow me to open up and fall unapologetically. Until then, I’m perfectly content not rushing into anything — seeking love just doesn’t seem right, or worth it for that matter. But, patient and genuine love does.
There you have it — my three main [and extremely vulnerable] answers to the million dollar question. That said, there’s still a greater story around this question. So, here are my open and blatantly honest answers…
I’m single because I love being single. That’s an easy one. I love playing the game of life by my own rules, pushing my own limits, and pressing pause on any given chapter at any given time. I love the high that comes from paving my own path and building my very own success story. I love being wild and free, taking on any and every challenge, anywhere in the world, because I have nothing holding me back or keeping me tied down.
I’m single because, quite frankly, I just don’t like dating. It’s exhausting and confusing. I have way too many other priorities in my own hectic, always on-the-go, life to have dating become a set priority. To be honest, I prefer to not even use the word “date” or “dating”. I’d rather just say let’s go grab food, hang out, go to the park — I will legitimately use any word but date.
I’m single because I’m fully invested in my friendships. My girlfriends are my rock, my voice of reason, my people. More often than not, this is why I result to friend-zoning men to begin with. Out of building that level of comfort and trust from the get-go, yes. But also because I have come to value true, genuine, and quality friendships before relationships, and maintaining them is a priority.
I’m single because I value and appreciate my “me” time. I live a very chaotic, high-performance life — both personally and professionally. Learning to love being alone at times; and taking that time to be really, truly present and in the moment. That in itself has taken lots of practice and time. And I love it. It allows me to put my to-be-continued success story as #1.
I’m single because I’m a wanderer. I don’t like to stay in one place for too long. I like new and exciting. I live for the thrill and spontaneous adventure. I have too many places to see, cultures to experience, and people to meet before settling down with one person in one place.
I’m single because I’m so comfortable in my own skin. Maybe a little too comfortable…either way, I love living my own life on my own terms, by my own playbook, setting my own rules.
I’m single because I realize I only have so many years to be really, truly single. I only have so much time to create the life I wanted; a life designed specifically for me, my vision, and my passions before I have to think about sharing all of it with someone else. This is the time in my life where I am my #1 priority.
I’m single because I have too much love in my heart and soul to share with far too many people, places, and things in this world. At this moment, right here, right now.